Become Incredibly Selfish
That doesn't mean it won't take some ‘work' on your part to consider these timeless invitations. Habits do require some handling. However, unhooking from the assumptions that rule your world will unleash the freedom and creative expression to design the life you want to live.
Principle #1: Become Incredibly Selfish
If you were raised to be a ‘good girl' or a ‘good boy' this sounds downright blasphemous. Most folks were taught to think of others first, especially if you're a woman. You are trained to serve, help, take care of… OTHERS. Well, let's turn that one on its side!
“Fortune really does favor the brave, and the brave are
guided by their own lights.” Thomas Leonard
I've taken the liberty to distill Thomas' ten tips into five, but the essence of his suggestions remain:
1. Reorient around being Selfish. Being selfish has gotten a bad rap. That's because our needs as a people have changed. At one time survival depended on putting the clan's needs first. We have evolved and so have our needs. Today, it is crucial to take care of yourself first. Remember the flight attendant's advice: in case of emergency put your own mask on first, then you can help others. Your evolution depends on the conscious and focused expression of your energy. Your selfishness contributes the evolution of others.
2. Know what you want and say it! Make it a practice to say ‘No!' and mean it! All those social niceties that have you tolerate behavior and environments that don't suit you are an energy drain, and in the end, dishonest. Be clear about how you feel and what you want and clearly communicate it. In today's high paced world, your energy is at a premium. Don't waste it by trying to cover up authentic needs.
3. Selfishness creates reserves. When you have reserves you are naturally and authentically abundant. This goes way beyond being nice. This kind of abundance, with no hidden agenda, transforms every encounter. This doesn't take away from you, when giving is sourced from your reserves it actually makes room for more flow. This kind of selfishness unleashes infinite abundance for you and others.
4. Don't keep company with those who can't be ‘selfish.' You don't want to hang around folks that don't ‘get selfishness.' Moralizing and justifying are energy draining experiences that an evolutionary change agent can't afford. Upgrade your environment instantly by hanging out with other folks who are willing to take on this level of ‘selfishness' for themselves, and honor it in others.
5. Relinquish scarcity. I know it seems like others might miss out on some things if you decide to be selfish. I invite you to explore the abundance of the Universe. There is always more air to breathe – more than enough for everyone else – even as you deeply inhale. As is so often cited in special reports, even hunger (the lack of food) is an illusion. It's just a problem of delivery. Consider that the same holds true for everyone. There's plenty for everyone, it's just a ‘delivery problem.' You can shift that for others by shifting it for yourself.
For the next week, just practice being selfish in this new way. Make a list of ONE selfish thing that you can do each day, allow yourself to go to the edge of being selfish in ways that you've never imagined. Try it on, it's only seven days! You'll be glad you did and so will everyone else.
Listen to the audio…
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About the Author
Adela Rubio writes and speaks on awakening your creative essence with the power of collaboration and community. She's hosted 20+ Women's Writing Circles, 30-Day Adventures, and Telesummits.